Episode 138 - Are You Perfect Yet?

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[Music] hey everybody michael here we are taking a little mid-season break from the weekly podcast releases for june and july but there's still lots happening in the liturgist community we have extra materials for you to check out in the break like the black history is american history series that william put together earlier this year there's a second weekly podcast that we produce for our patrons called the alien podcast where i talk to different people in the community about you know life about the most absurd things a lot of times uh then we have the sunday thing which is an online zoom meeting that you know 100 or two of us get on every sunday we meditate together have breakout discussion groups etc um that's always a good time really cool community full of a bunch of you know smart open-hearted people we have guided meditations we have 24 7 zoom rooms you can meet and hang out in we have ad free versions of the literature's podcast all kinds of stuff um and if you appreciate the literature podcast or any of the work that we do please join us join the community be part of this thing with us and don't worry if you can't afford the tears in patreon to be able to financially support it don't let that stop you um there are free slots available for people who can't afford you know five or ten bucks for a month or whatever the different slots are so don't let finances restrict you from having access to this community you can get in and be part of it no matter what your circumstances are so just go to the liturgists.com and click join the liturgists and we'd love to have you so even though the main podcast is off schedule right now we thought we'd give you this little bonus episode here um it actually comes from one of the other podcasts in the liturgist network called loving this which is a podcast that i host about non-dual spirituality and this is a special episode because i just released my new solo album on friday under the name weiwou w e i w u the album's called are you perfect yet in this podcast that you're about to hear i made it for the loving this podcast to talk a bit more about some of the philosophy and spirituality behind the album and uh planning on releasing another podcast here in a bit that's a little bit more specifically about one of the more musical and production aspects of the record but this podcast is i don't know it sort of almost leads to a sort of meditative experience of inviting us to be in our bodies to experience the fullness of life in this very moment that's why i made this record so i hope you enjoy it i do hope you'll check out the record again it's called are you perfect yet this song is playing underneath me right now is from that record called shimmer and uh i'll let you hear a second of this song and then we'll get into the other podcast thanks for listening [Music] everybody [Music] [Music] i [Music] all people uh when you were god's world there is nobody that respects women [Music] hey everybody michael here today we're going to be talking about the core idea of my new solo album under the artist name weiwou called are you perfect yet but first i thought i'd just share the title track with you let you get the vibe so here we go [Music] are you perfect yet [Music] are you perfect [Music] oh [Music] everybody [Music] living for the very first time [Music] is [Music] [Applause] [Music] so [Music] uh well i got to tell you the michael gunger ego has really been just piping in more over the last few months you know i've been more cranky less patient less understanding less motivated than normal and i think at least some of this has to do with everything that's been happening in the world you know before the pandemic began i was in a pretty great rhythm for this organism i had a pretty good balance of energy going in and going out had a pretty good balance of solitude and time with others you know had plenty of physical exercise leisure date nights everything was going pretty swimmingly and of course the endless groundhog day of the pandemic [Music] has really screwed all that up [Music] add to that the anger that so many of us are feeling about the systemic racism that we all swim in that results in so many black men being brutalized and killed by the police add to that fear you know fear about the economy the looting the vitriol on social media and boy oh boy what a stew we have brewing a few weeks ago i was just feeling some of the heaviness of the world and feeling a lot of compassion for humanity so like the proverbial dog who returns to his vomit i logged into twitter to try to spread some love here's what i tweeted heaven is not a place where you are made perfect after you die heaven is the realization that you're already perfect as you are now as has happened before i put my phone down didn't pay much attention actually sort of forgot that i tweeted it then the next day at some point twitter alerted me that there was more activity than usual in my mentions and i saw that there were hundreds of angry comments about this tweet let me give you a little sampling of a few of them one episcopal priest said that is the most theologically bankrupt and depressing thing i've ever heard keith said while we are just making stuff up out of thin air heaven is a guy named ray that hangs out near my local 7-eleven i thought that was pretty good jr said the amount of unchecked privilege required to actually believe this is really something people called it wicked people told me to repent and be saved eric said this is easily one of the stupidest things i've ever read reservoir dog said the road to hell is paved with well tweets like this and on and on there's lots lots of very angry tweets today i want to explore why it is that a tweet like that or you know my new record is possibly so offensive to people why is it that saying something like you're perfect as you are now is so offensive i can't imagine that current circumstances in our society aren't making it even more extreme like look around duh you know this is not necessarily the time that most of our society is like really jonesing to hear a nearly 40 year old white passing dude sing about the true nature of the self and frankly it's a little embarrassing to be putting out a record right now with everything else going on i don't feel sort of like busking at a funeral or something on the other hand we are in such upheaval we are in such a crazy time a cool zone as some people on twitter have called it one of these historical times when everything is up in the air and there's really potential for something new to happen because we're really asking fundamental questions about our world and ourselves right now and while i have no delusions of grandeur that the world really wants to hear what this musician has to say about what we need to do and frankly i don't have a whole lot of opinion and zero qualifications to do such a thing i do hope that this work for at least a few people can help continue the questions that these questions that we're asking as we're sort of looking down into the roots of the tree the lower floors of the building that we can be inspired to keep asking to keep searching to keep looking at how the roots affect the fruit so often what happens in life is that we build story upon story upon story in a way that we lose track of what lies underneath you can think of it sort of like an old city where there are layers of history beneath the sidewalks that nobody's thinking about anymore old streets and buildings and railroads and entire civilizations forgotten forgotten but not irrelevant because the rest of the city is built upon all of that all of that is the foundation upon which the rest of civilization continues to build itself on and this is what's so hard about fighting things like patriarchy or white supremacy stories like white people are more valuable than black people are not written across the top of job applications are not printed in police training manuals stories like that are deeper in the roots of the tree you're not going to hear someone in a mainstream media company say women are mere sex objects that exist simply for the pleasure of men but you're going to see a lot of media companies and the people in media companies behaving [Music] voting marketing hiring producing content as though that story was true so as we begin to look down through the layers of stories many of us for the first time wondering things like you know hey why do so few people control almost all of earth's resources or hey why is it that black people are three times more likely to be killed by the police than white people maybe we can keep these questions coming keep looking at what it is we are doing here on this planet what is all of this who are we and for a lot of people questions like these are really fundamental questions like who am i seem esoteric or even silly you know questions to occupy weed-smoking freshman philosophy students in their dorm rooms in the middle of the night but these fundamental questions are not just theoretical exercises they are the foundations on which our lives and our society is built if patriarchy is in the roots of the tree the question of who am i that's even deeper than that i mean that's not that's not just the roots that's not just the soil it's not just the earth it's it's the universe itself in which and as which all trees and all roots grow before there can be beliefs there must be a believer and so who is this believer who is the subject of all of these thoughts and actions and ways of building the world there is no more fundamental question than this because there's nothing more fundamental there's nothing that we are less conscious of it's the bottom layer of the city it's the very foundation of everything that we've built the absolute bedrock question of everything we do say and believe and very few of us bother questioning it to any serious degree why bother digging up the ground to see what's way down at the bottom when the sidewalk seems perfectly convenient to walk on the problem is that if we want to make any meaningful change up here on the sidewalk where we're all living we're gonna have to do some work underneath the surface if we want the fruit of the tree to change we're gonna have to dig up some roots get into the soil while it does make me laugh a little bit when i think of the extreme responses to my tweet about heaven being the experience of seeing that it's all already perfect i actually do get why people would be so mad i mean interpreted a certain way the idea that everything is perfect already implies that anything people are trying to do to improve their lives or other people's lives it's basically a waste of time you could hear that in a way that you know delegitimizes all religion all justice work all self-help all discipline and practice because if everything's already perfect why bother changing anything in the same way that saying all lives matter to someone who is saying black lives matter is sort of like undermining what they're trying to do saying that all is perfect now is is offensive to every floor of the building [Laughter] because why are we building then if we've already arrived what are we doing why bother working for justice why bother literally any of the floors anything that we're building as a society if it's all perfect now and you go to somebody who's trying to build and you're like oh it's done we're it's it's already perfect that can be the most offensive thing because it's calling into question the whole thing who you are and if you are already perfect well then the ego goes well then what the hell are we doing that can't be true that is an attack on everything that i believe on everything that i stand for so why in the world would i tweet something so absurd so heretical so trite and foolish and wicked as telling people that they are perfect in this moment when we call something perfect we are usually implying that it is without flaw fault or defect something that's exactly like it should be which basically means exactly like we want it to be there's something about the concept of perfect that makes us feel good and we have it as a word it's like oh it's so perfect when something is perfect for you when you feel like you had a an ice cream cone that was just the perfect ice cream cone because you were just so hot and in the mood for sweets and the ice cream cone just was the perfect texture and the flavor was just what you wanted everything about it was just perfect oh it's perfect so we use a word like that and what we're when we're describing something that actually is it kind of comes with a feeling right it comes with this feeling of oh i am wanting for nothing with this ice cream cone this i wouldn't change it a bit so let me ask you a question if you look at this moment this very moment like the smallest segment of time as if you paused reality and just looked at this very moment can you change anything about this moment and before you answer that question let's just really look it's easy to just sort of jump the gun and be like well yes of course i can change everything about this moment if i'm sitting i can stand if i'm speaking i can stop speaking but that's a story of several moments that's a that's a series of moments let's talk about just this moment as small as you can slice it this very moment if your eyes are open right now is it possible for them to also be closed right now at this exact moment if you're sitting right now is it possible for you to be standing in this moment no this is why all the great sages and mystics through history have said things like this moment is inevitable or this moment is all there is because what could this moment be but this moment this moment can't be some other moment this moment is as it is and there's absolutely nothing you can do about it you can do something theoretically about what you'll be doing the next moment you can have a thought that says i'm going to stand up but if the body stands it cannot at the same time be sitting this may sound very silly to you but it's actually quite profound simple but life-changing actually because when you see that when you see the inevitability of this moment you see that this moment is not only the culmination and crowning glory of 13.77 billion years of moments in this universe but you see that this moment is all that ever is all that ever is is inevitable and all that ever is is now our ideas about the future our memories of the past those are just dream worlds those are false universes that only exist in our minds there is no tomorrow there is no yesterday there is only in reality this this this of course part of this is our minds part of this is our projections of the past into the future part of what is is the human ability to imagine to build and create universes in our minds that can become the moment that is so there's a important subtlety here and this subtlety is what changes what i'm saying from being the most defensive thing possible to the most freeing thing imaginable and this subtlety can be hard to grasp because we humans experience time in this linear way where we can remember all the yesterdays and we can forecast all of the tomorrows and those things feel so real because our memory and our imagination is so powerful but when we see that those things are just in the mind and that what is is only now what is now becomes so large and expansive and infinite that it includes the mind it includes the dreaming it includes the illusion so what i'm saying is not going to these different floors of the building and saying don't worry about building it's already done don't don't bother doing it anymore stop that's not what i'm saying in fact in a way it's precisely the opposite it's look we're building and this is exactly what we should be doing because this is what's happening right and it's so easy to project that onto somebody else so i say that to you that this moment for you as your breathing as you're listening to this as you're thinking the thoughts that you're thinking feeling the feelings that you're feeling this precise moment is fully complete in itself there's nothing else that you could be doing so there's nothing else that you should be doing to say that you should be doing something else would be to create an imaginary this and then to believe in that imaginary this but it's so easy to hear that and to go well but what about those people what about that situation that's happening that's not right how can we say that it's perfect i'm not talking about that situation i'm talking about this moment this very moment when you look at this very moment what are you doing you're being when you're not off in your mind living somewhere else what are you doing you're just being this moment and since this moment is all that's ever happening there's only ever now there's a stillness to that experience when you're just fully present in the moment there's a like an empty stillness to that because what's happening is always and only this one inevitable moment but there's a paradox in that because of course within the stillness there is all of this stuff there's all of this movement everything that's happening is happening in the moment so at the heart of all of this there's this paradox it is being and that being is completely still and full of all the movement of everything that might sound confusing let me give you another analogy think of a an old television set you ever see like the that snow or that noise on the on the screen of a channel that isn't coming in in that noise there's so much movement right there's all these pixels moving every which way and it's total chaos but if you shift your perception from the contents of the screen all that noise to the screen itself you can feel how your perception of chaos moves to a perception of stillness the screen is still even though the screen contains all of this moving chaos there's both the complete stillness of the screen and the motion within it this moment is the screen upon which all of the motion of the universe plays itself upon and most often we identify with the noise on the screen that dot that jitter that pixel it's on the screen that we are building our society improving our lives becoming more loving more just more kind but what is any of the noise on screen without the screen itself what is the movement of the universe without the absolute perfect and empty stillness of this very moment when i or some more respectful spiritual teacher than myself invites you to witness the still perfection of yourself in and as this moment it's not the same thing as saying that the specific arrangement of pixels on the screen should stop changing no the change of the pixels is part of what the screen is in that same way when i say that you are perfect as you are now that includes all your feelings of imperfection that includes all of the knowledge of the ways that you could have behaved more lovingly more justly it includes all of your desire to make this world tomorrow a better place that's part of the perfection that i'm talking about the incompleteness the imperfection of it all is part of its perfection but then isn't that just semantics are we just why bother saying it right why bother saying it's perfect well because there is something about when you live as the stillness of the moment that not only helps you enjoy your life more but it also allows you to be more powerful more present in what you're doing there's this phrase that a lot of you have probably been hearing lately no justice no peace it's something that people have been saying in protests for at least a couple decades and there's actually an old dr martin luther king jr quote where he said there can be no justice without peace and there can be no peace without justice and there are different interpretations of what these words might mean for some people no justice no peace is a conditional statement like an if then statement if there is no justice then there can be no peace but there's another way of looking at this statement that is conjunctive or interdependent like the two realities go together peace and justice and to understand that concept one more analogy for you here mr analogy today what would be more disturbing to you to be yelled at by that person on the sidewalk who's obviously mentally ill walking around just screaming and ranting at every person that he walks by or being screamed at and cussed at by somebody like mr rogers right like it's one thing to be yelled at by someone who's just raving mad and is just flying off the handle and has no centeredness about them it's quite another thing to be yelled at by someone who you know has an incredible deep sense of abiding peace right like to have the guy who said look at the birds there's nothing to worry about coming to your temple with a whip and start overturning tables i imagine had to be quite a a visceral experience if he did you know if it was just again some some person off the street that was raving uh and came in with a whip he'd be like oh call the police get people get this guy out of here but when the prince of peace says i have not come to bring peace but a sword you go holy shit right like when martin luther king says something it rings in a different way than just your average joe why because there's like a a power a presence a a peace that justice is coming from that makes that justice so much more powerful there is no more powerful agent of change than a person who knows that it's already perfect i know that's a paradox i hear the contradiction in that and that's precisely what makes it so beautifully true it's like if you want to save your life you must lose it it's that core contradiction at the heart of things stillness and movement go together if you're busy being only the movement you are being unconscious of your full capacity not only that you are lost in a dream world you're not living in the world that is you're living in the fantasy world of yesterday and tomorrow and there's nothing wrong with this process of creating false worlds just happens to come with suffering because when we create these false worlds the world that is not in our minds and we cling on to that world rather than the world that is well now we're not at home in the world that is in the moment that is while i'm sitting i'm not at ease because i wish i was standing so often live in this world that is not in these moments that are not and it's so fundamental to the human experience like the buddha said life is suffering here's the fun part what happens when you stop resisting suffering what happens when you stop trying to push away what is by escaping in your mind to some other reality other than this moment well that sort of takes the sting away from suffering doesn't it if suffering is clinging to what is not and you stop clinging to what is not what becomes of suffering but again don't miss the paradox here it's so easy to move from the freedom that is found in embracing suffering loving what is including the suffering and how in that the suffering dissipates there's a difference between that and spiritually bypassing suffering by avoiding what is and using some sort of coping mechanism to escape reality the message in my tweet about you being perfect or the message of my new album are you perfect yet which is basically an invitation to look at the absurdity of our constant incessant striving while also inviting us to be more present in that striving that paradox right at the heart of it are you perfect yet as you strive to become better are you perfect yet as you keep working is it perfect yet is what you're doing perfect yet will it ever be perfect so often what we think about when we think about perfection is a world that doesn't exist in which i have everything that i want everything is exactly perfect meaning there is no dissonance there is no suffering or shadow it's all just perfect meaning nothing else i would add to this but such a concept is is ludicrous right what is life without pain in a perfect world if i want to pull off my ear like let's say i mean wouldn't shouldn't i be able to do that in a perfect world shouldn't i be able to have whatever i want if i want to pull off my ear should my ear not hurt should that not hurt my body to pull off its ear is that a more perfect world when pulling off ears doesn't actually communicate any sensations to the body no if it didn't hurt to pull off our ears people be pulling off their ears all the time pain is what keeps a body together pain is what the communication is between nerves and brains pain is what keeps us safe that's what keeps us alive there is no life without pain there is no light without dark there is no selflessness without selfishness nor generosity without greed like if you couldn't choose to be greedy what even is generosity right you can't have love without hate what is this concept of perfect where i get everything i want but then what if i want everything what if i want all the money in the world and i get it what about everybody else so this concept of perfect is just an absurd concept if by perfect we mean some sort of static reality in which everybody has everything they want in other words if everybody's false universe becomes the real universe do you see what i mean like we want what is not so if everybody could get what is not what does that even mean what we all get is what is and sure what is changes and evolves moment to moment but that's exactly what we all get is what is so what if we shifted our thought about perfection from illusion to reality what if you looked at this moment and saw that you can't change it a bit there's nothing that about this small moment that you can do anything about it is what it is so then the question becomes how do you relate to this moment if it cannot be changed if it is inevitable and you embrace that surrender to that well then it becomes perfect doesn't it just as you had that perfect ice cream cone that you wouldn't have changed anything about it if you wouldn't change anything about this moment because you know that you can't because it is and you surrender to that and there's nothing to change about it and you're just at home completely in this moment well that sounds like heaven that sounds perfect that's the same feeling that's that feeling of oh there's nothing about this that i would change because there's nothing about this that you can change it's so easy to put that back into story mode rather than pause mode right in story mode you go well no i can't there is so much about this that i want to change i want people to not kill each other anymore i want people to have equal access to education to employment i want people to experience dignity and respect yes yes yes yes and amen to all of that but in this moment when you go small enough what do you find i had a bicycle fall recently i was riding my bike and i fell on the gravel road scraped up my knees it's really painful and as i was laying there on the pavement i could feel the pain but this is i did this that i'm talking about right now is i just went i was just so present with the moment of it the very moment that you get when you're in the very moment you can't really tell a story about pain because when you zoom up on that thought and you say and you just are present with what it is it's just sensation and what is that sensation when you're really fully present with it it's almost like you slow down a wave form in music and what starts off fast like this you slow it down and all of a sudden it just goes and all the movement of the world all the movement of the universe when you slow it down into this moment you get all the way into this moment sink into it entirely there's nothing happening but home there's nothing here but the ocean the ocean of being and yes within that ocean of being all sorts of stories get told and experienced and within that plane of experience we seek to make things better we seek to make the world a more just and beautiful place but can you see how that drive is also part of the perfection this is not a stagnant thing the universe is not a stagnant thing you are not a stagnant thing the universe is dynamic it's moving it's more like music or like a dance than a noun it's something that is happening it's a verb it's active actively moving changing moment to moment to moment and the movement itself is part of what makes this so beautiful and dare i say so perfect but what if this moment is not just a stepping stone to some moment that finally matters someday somewhere else what if the fullness of love of grace of god of peace is present in every moment if that's true i don't think that negates change at all i don't think it negates evolution it doesn't negate moving towards being more just as a society it just allows us to fully experience it the movement moving from less just to more just can be beautiful the whole time again from the place of storylines this can sound barbaric and you can get a lot of angry tweets saying stuff like this because it can be heard as though you're saying i'm okay you should be too right i've got all this privilege i don't have anybody's i'm not enslaved to anybody i don't have anybody pointing a gun at me right now so i feel like this is perfect and of course this is not what i'm saying i'm saying that even as your hands are nailed to the cross when you're present at the moment saying something like father forgive them they don't know what they're doing is not an act of moral superiority it's an act of presence it's an act of seeing what is clearly [Music] because when you're fully present with what is just as it is now and you can see that it's inevitable that it cannot be changed and that there are nearly 14 billion years of events that have happened just so every jot and tittle of it just so in the way that this moment would finally happen exactly like this where all the planets are just where they are and every thought that's happening on earth is happening just as as it is right now in every feeling every action it's all in this moment the only thing it could possibly be and when you see that and you let go to it and don't try to live in another moment but you just become this moment all the lines between you and your neighbor between you and your environment all the lines between you and not you dissolve not dissolve completely necessary and that necessarily in that you know again that there's no pain in the body or that there's no senses that are differentiated or stories that are still seen experienced all that's still happening but when you can get so enveloped in the fullness of this moment you can see that there's nowhere else to be there's nothing else to be happening in this and that this is perfect as it is and when you see that what is there to suffer or because who is there to suffer it's just you not you the small body not you bill sarah you the all you the music in your grumpy days in your ego days in your blissful open conscious days it all belongs it's all perfect thanks for listening everybody